When Do I Get My Turn?

There are people out there who assured me that my fifties would be easier than my forties. Like an idiot, I believed them.

Other people seemed to believe that in this decade of life, I would be able to do those things that I really WANTED to do...not just the things I had to.

Things I want to do, but can cross off my list 'cause it'll never happen:
*be a movie star
*marry a prince
*grow three more inches
*make a zillion dollars
*live in a big city
*be one of the 'cool' people.

Any advice from the youngsters?

DOB: unknown

Received the fifth "Thanks but no thanks...not even interested in interviewing you" e-mail.
Contrary to popular belief, I'm rather amusing in person. I'm smart and funny and I'm not afraid of a little hard work. I don't expect to get paid the big bucks...I'll even do a "trial run" for free--let me give you a week of my time. You won't be disappointed.
But no.

Honestly, I think folks are put off by my age.
What else can it be? I have an undergraduate degree in English/Communications and a graduate degree in Education. I am a fantastic reader, a good writer and can communicate clearly and effectively.

I can get thirteen- and fourteen-year-old BOYS to dance a production number from "A Chorus Line."

I am magical.

But I can't even get an interview.

I'm thinking of leaving my year of my graduation from Westminster off of my resume to see if it makes a difference. I know that ageism is illegal, but I believe it exists. (Just like prostitution, but I AM too old to go that route!)

Meanwhile, if you hear of any jobs that call for someone who can read and write and think and motivate and work a little magic now and then, please let me know!

I Am Not Myself

I had a discussion (some might call it a disagreement) with a friend yesterday. She and I don't really know each other very well, but our circles overlap. She is young
(29) and pretty (pageant queen) and talented (sing, dance....you name it, she can do it). When I questioned the validity of a "quarter-life crisis," she said that a quarter-life crisis was real.

Here's the difference between her quarter-life crisis and my mid-life one: hers is situational. She doesn't necessarily have any power over the situation, but situations change. Yes, she's slogging through $hit, and it stinks as $hit usually does. But eventually the $hit will dissipate and she will reach higher ground.

Mine is physical. I was a dance minor in college. (You ask yourself: Really? You don't LOOK like a dancer. This is your nice way of calling me overweight. I'll be the first person to admit I don't weigh 107 anymore.) Not only can I not dance, I can barely go up and down stairs. And even if I could perform a twelve-count without worrying that I might break a hip and they would put me out of my misery by taking me out back and firing a bullet into me, it would take me an hour to learn. Because my brain doesn't work, either. So the $hit that I'm slogging through just gets deeper.

$hit. We've all got it, irregardless of how old we are. The best we can hope to do is hold hands and make sure no one drowns.